Indie Break-Up Songs for Kübler-Ross’s Five Stages of Loss and Grief

Kübler-Ross’s Five Stages of Loss and Grief are:

1. Denial
2. Anger
3. Bargaining
4. Depression
5. Acceptance

This sequence has been applied to the omnipresent break-up by Darci Gilbert, as referenced on Wikipedia via eHow (Gilbert, Darci. [www.ehow.com/how-does_4674267_stages-grief-apply-breakups.html "How Do the Stages of Grief Apply to Breakups?"] . eHow. Retrieved 13 April 2013.). If it's alternative/indie rock that helps you through, then like an awful pun involving bananas, the following selection may have appeal.


Denial

“The person getting broken up with is unable to admit that the relationship is really over. They may try to continue to call the person when that person wants to be left alone.”

“Yeah! Oh, Yeah!” by The Magnetic Fields

“By Your Side,” by CocoRosie

"Start Again," by Teenage Fanclub

Anger

"When the reality sets in that the relationship is over, it is common to demand to know why they are being broken up with. This phase can make them feel like they are being treated unfairly and it may cause them to become angry at people close to them who want to help aid the situation."

“Waiting for the Winter,” by The Popguns

"The One I Love," by REM

“You Oughta Know," by Alanis Morrissette

Bargaining
"After the anger stage, one will try to plead with their former partner by promising that whatever caused the breakup will never happen again. Example: 'I can change. Please give me a chance'."

“I Apologize,” by Husker Du

“Please Do Not Go,” by Violent Femmes

“Good Woman,” by Cat Power

Depression
"Next the person might feel discouraged that their bargaining plea did not convince their former partner to change their mind. This will send the person into the depression stage and can cause a lack of sleep, eating and even disrupt daily life tasks such as bowel movements."

“I Know It’s Over,” by The Smiths

“It’s Okay,” by Land of Talk

“Katy Song,” by Red House Painters

Acceptance

"Moving on from the situation and person is the last stage. The person accepts that the relationship is over and begins to move forward with their life. The person might not be completely over the situation but they are done going back and forth to the point where they can accept the reality of the situation."

“Here’s Where the Story Ends,” by The Sundays

"Sheela-Na-Gig," by PJ Harvey

 

“This Time There's No Happy Ending," by Television Personalities

Eleven Ecstatically Happy Songs

To celebrate the return of my favorite childhood confectionery - hot cinnamon tic tacs - there follows a list of all-purpose, ebullient tunes. This should recompense for a previous entry suiting quite the opposite set of moods. Enjoy!
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"Sweet Jane," by The Velvet Underground

I'd call this classic, but then again, I call everything by The Velvet Underground classic.

"All Around You (Intro)," by The Brian Jonestown Massacre

The warm, friendly bit of psychedelic trippiness that kicks-off The Satanic Majesties' Second Request.

"Punk Rock Girl," by The Dead Milkmen

I can't listen to this one without grinning widely. Everything about this is hilarious. Three cheers for the Philadelphian accent!

"Certain People I Know," by Morrissey

Miserablist my arsenal: a song for those days when you can take just about anything with a grain of salt... or sand.

"The 59th Street Bridge Song (Feelin’ Groovy)," by Simon and Garfunkel

I listened to this frequently when I first returned to dear old Glasgow. Continuing my education in the city I loved most meant the constant need to stifle spontaneous smiling. "What the fuck is he so happy about?"

"Can't Hardly Wait," by The Replacements

Nervous anticipation, when, after far too long, we finally know for certain that it's all going to turn out wonderfully.

"Change," by The Lightning Seeds

"Oh, you fool, you've got me started..."

"I Kissed a Girl," by Jill Sobule

A convincing little love song for the list.

"The Big Sky," by Kate Bush

"That cloud... that cloud... looks like Ireland!" I likewise tend to spot geopolitical entities in the sky.

"Waiting for the Great Leap Forward," by Billy Bragg

Takes you down before taking you way, way up. This is for all of you dispirited lefties out there: if no one out there understands, start your own revolution and cut out the middle-man!

"Tom Hark," by Elias and his Zig Zag Jive Flutes

Pennywhistle playfulness from South Africa, 1956. Stewart Lee must be a fan.

12 Classic Youth (Un)Employment Songs

I like to think of the following as coming-of-age music. They all highlight that pivotal point in our lives when we confront the impracticality of our greatest aspirations: an inevitable, albeit difficult part of growing-up. If you're in that proverbial boat, may these songs - angry yet empathetic - lend you some comfort.
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“Career Opportunities,” by The Clash

Emphasizing the whole youth thing, here's the version on Sandinista!, sung by Mickey Gallagher's (the keyboardist from Ian Dury and the Blockheads) two boys.

“Ghost Town,” by The Specials

Reckless driving through deserted streets... written after a visit to Glasgow.

“Living with Unemployment,” by The Oppressed

I was first introduced to the Newtown Neurotics version of this song, but The Oppressed, an anti-fascist skinhead band, wrote it first. Both versions are excellent.

“When You’re Young,” by The Jam

"Swallow your youthful pride!" belted The Jam to a bunch of teens, live on Something Else. And then the end credits start rolling.

“The Government Administrator,” by Eggs

Indie rock song about deciding whether or not to apply for a job you don't really want, while waiting among a sea of other nervous applicants, with that demon on your shoulder reminding you that time is running out.

“To Have and Have Not,” by Billy Bragg

Leave it to Billy Bragg to powerfully-link youth unemployment with the structural defects inherent in capitalism:
"At twenty one you're on top of the scrapheap
At sixteen you were top of the class
All they taught you at school
Was how to be a good worker
The system has failed you, don't fail yourself"

“What’s Happening Brother?” by Marvin Gaye

Coming home from the Vietnam War to a country in socio-economic mailaise.

“Young, Gifted and Skint,” by New Model Army

There's probably a Nina Simone/Lorraine Hansberry reference in that title... About being fresh out of university and heavily in debt: how relatable!

“Bastards of Young,” by The Replacements

A rallying cry for anyone experiencing the various quarter-life crises, (un)employment included.

“1 in 10,” by UB40

As in, one out of ten people unemployed in the United Kingdom during the time the song was written. A testimony to the apathy with which society regards the unemployed poor. The band itself is named after a claim form for "the dole."

“Wham Rap! (Enjoy What You Do?),” by Wham!

George Michael sings something vaguely political, but not politically-correct (I have full confidence that you’ll detect the lyric to which I am referring…)

“Hand in Pocket,” by Alanis Morissette

We'll end this entry on a note of cautious optimism: "I'm young and I'm underpaid, I'm tired but I'm workin', yeah!"

Indeed, as Alanis consoles:
"No one's really got it figured out just yet"